Sunday, June 21, 2009

Hmmm,

I will be the first to admit that I'm not nice. I'm a bitch.

I think my attitude is a huge contributing factor in the kind of men that approach me. For years my joke has been that guys who approach me are either a) really drunk b) really brave or c) really horny.

I was working the other night and met a cute guy...okay I met one GORGEOUS guy and one cute guy, but tried to keep it professional, y'know? One invited himself to my hotel for a private after party (uh...?) and the other sent me an email (we were all working at the event in different capacities). It was Gorgeous who invited himself to my room, and Cute who emailed me.

I called Cute back the next day as I made my way back to the city. We chatted, he then said it would have be cool if I stayed in town another evening, because we could've hung out that evening (his email suggested a drink).

I thought "cool"...so we ended up making tentative plans to meet up after he went to a dinner. We agreed to a nightcap, then he said he wouldn't be able to make it to the city until well after last call. No suggestion of what activity we might do...

So you know what activity he was thinking of...

Really? I'm only half surprised, though.

I explained that I would be making it an early nigh, because I had event to go to the next night and I had to still be at my desk for my day job on Monday. He writes back and later one writes that he only got in at 5 a.m., to which I said "sounds like you had a good time" he writes back "it would've been better if we had hooked up"

Urk.

In my opinion the definition of "hooking up" is way too fluid and depends on the hour it's used at.
If a guy says at 12 p.m. "you wanna hook up"? It could mean actually going out somewhere and doing something; if the same thing is said at 12 a.m., it means something different and the words "hook" and "up" become one word. I wrote back that I wanted a definition of what he meant. Because while Gorgeous flirted with me all night (making it hard to remain professional...damn that Dolce and Gabbana cologne!) Cute really didn't. In fact, I had no clue he was interested in me beyond a professional level, until I got his email saying that he missed out on saying goodnight to me...

He wrote back that hookup could mean whatever I wanted it to mean at any hour.

Le sigh.

I told my girl P about it and she said, "you need to tell him how sleazy he's coming off right now, lol". Agreed. So I wrote back

"I like my clothes and tend to keep them on..."

And then (because he's a DJ) I sent him a link to this song:



Mmmhmm... I did.

He wrote back, that he loves the song but that Jermaine was wrong.

SMDH. He going in that pile with all the rest.

I'm NOT gorgeous... so I really have struggled to figure out why I always get this invite. I've even asked my guy friends why is it guys go straight for the "kill" with me? Is it in the vibe I give off?

Guys, this will be my topic for the next video (will shoot it next weekend, even if I can't get my regular camera guy): what do women think when you do this?

As for me, he's cute, we have stuff in common, but he has committed a major FAIL with his comments. What turned into drinks, and what could've turned into something else might not be.

I'm not frigid, it just turns me off when it's the first thing I'm asked; and before anyone asks, I tend to be more covered than 90% of the women in the room, so please don't even suggest it's the way I dress! I like movies, I eat food...why can't I sistah get an invite to dinner or a movie? Normally, I would discount him because he's a DJ and when I hear that I automatically think of Jemini's "No More Dating DJs"; and now, he's got a strike against him. What do you think sweeties, should I give him a chance to redeem himself or should I leave him in that pile with the others?

My girl P has said "I'm gonna introduce you to some good guys tonight!" So I'll keep you posted.

I'll leave the fate of Cute up to you guys - vote here or on twitter

xoxo

p.s. Gorgeous' number is in my back pocket...

6 Comments:

  1. em said...
    No second chances for that ass, girl. Cute only did that because he peeped Gorg throwing himself at you, and was at a work event so it was important that he come off as potential so he can have you dip on Gorg for him. That's compensation for his shortfall in the looks dept. Obvi when he offered you stay he knew he had that dinner, but dinner probably turned into the club and he's hitting you at I assume 2am? Who makes a first "date" damn near at the crack of dawn.
    HLBB said...
    That has to be my favourite line from this whole situation: "who makes a first 'date' damn near at the crack of dawn"

    Well quick update: Gorgeous called me a little while back AT THE CRACK OF DAWN! 5:01 a.m. to be exact. To see what I was doing. Me: sleeping?
    Read Beanpie said...
    It's Beanpie here. I am just saying at that hour, it has nothing to do w/ the way you dress. The reason is simply that you are friendly and you have a vagina. Call me foul, wrong or whatever, but that is what it is. I'm not saying be mean, but most men think you are into them when you are friendly.
    HLBB said...
    Interesting...

    I'm not friendly...my friends will be the first to tell you that.

    LOL

    I should clarify, the 5 a.m. call came a week after meeting and exchanging numbers. It was the first contact I had with him since we met...

    As for dress...Long pants, long sleeved tunic...short heels...nothing provactive about my dress at this event.
    max said...
    i love this post - i have this problem too - and not just randoms or guys that i just met that are going for the kill; i also have men that i've known for a long time that suddenly up and decide that they need to hit it immediately and need not be respectful about it.
    fun.times.
    Anonymous said...
    I HAVE THIS EXACT PROBLEM RIGHT NOW... I met this guy at a friends wedding seemed cute and normal but since we've been talking its all about going straight for the KILL ..I dont want to be rude to him cause hes friends with my friend but at the same time SERIOUSLY why me and why going straight for it.. I DONT UNDERSTAND

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